reaching out

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Monday, December 11, 2006

i really REALLY want to attend church.
like how the others can, without parents restriction.
worship god with all my heart.

they're having church camp, went for part time today.
during the camp, i did think of my mother and my grandmother at home.
i really dont want to lie to them about going to do proj.
BUT I REALLY WANT TO ATTEND CHURCH.
i need to find the faith back in me.
i know this might seem selfish of me.
but i really want, I REALLY WANT.

for term4, ive been working hard. and I IMPROVED.
i learnt to do things willingly, find the spiritual gift. be more cheerful, etc.
at times, although i may not be on good terms with my family,
i want to bring them to see god's love also.
this might seem childish and impossible.
i wanna bring more pple to know of god's love.
im sure, it WILL motivate them.
become a better person, it WILL.

if god's love doesnt overwhelm us, then, why are so many pple worshipping god? working so hard for god.
making so much sacrifices.
i wanna speak to my parents about how much i really love god.
how much i really want to get closer to him.

all these have been weighing on my mind for a long time.
but, bcos of god, ive pulled through.
i used to sit around and find nothing in my life tht can interst me.
i just study, like theres no meaning behind it.
perhaps, this kind of life is still alright.
but i can guarantee since i trusted in christ, my life had a change.
i became refreshed, willing to go school and see whts in store.

theres this girl in my church.
her parents disallowed her to come to church.
but she still did, anyway.
so her parents tailed her.
and came into church and slapped her right in front of everyone.
YET, now she is a UNITleader.
its smth not easy to accomplish.

ITS BCOS, being slapped by her parents = a significance that she loved god so much tht she doesnt mind being slapped or punished.
she didnt deny god.

i dont have the courage to do wht the girl can do.
but i'll find the way out, somehow, with God, walking with me.